Hawaii!!!
The three of us need a serious vacation from life. Between my ordeal with Vinnie and the Feds, and Giuseppe with his uncle and cousin, Mutual Friend suggested we get away. Let’s just get away from everyone and everything. We pick Hawaii. Why? Well, because any place in Europe is crowed and it was tourist season too. Hawaii is relaxing, beautiful, peaceful, serene…… NOT! Okay, when we first arrive it’s all good. We check into this hotel, and I insist that we don’t get anything above the 6th floor. Why? Through all my years of traveling since I was even a child, I’ve learned that you don’t want to go above the 6th or 8th floor; depending on how the hotel is configurated because if there is a fire, the fire ladders can’t go beyond that floor. The guys agree. We’re on the third floor of this particular hotel. Everything is good. And yes, we have separate rooms. I have mine and the guys have one directly across the hall. We are beat when we arrive. So we all crash ironically in my room. I’m on the bed the guys are on the couch and chair. We fall asleep basically watching the Weather Channel and Hawaiian television. The next day, we go exploring. We go to the beach, we go to the volcanos, we go to the Tiki bars. We are having fun. I’m looking for this workout guy that had a workout show called Bodies in Motion. The dude on there was fiiiiiiinnneee! So I’m on the beach looking for him because his show was filmed in Hawaii. Yeah, I was that goofy. Anywho, later that afternoon, we are invited to a luau. YAAY! So that night we get ready. We are looking forward to the food and entertainment. We arrive, we watch stuff, talk, the guys drink. I don’t indulge, but they had non-alcoholic stuff. We’re looking at and enjoying the sunset. Beautiful…until…… First, we’re severed the pig. No big deal, it’s delicious! And yes, this is a very traditional luau….no utensils. The guys of course loved this. LOL. Me? Hey, when in Rome. Then comes the poi. It goes downhill from here folks. Poi is nasty, let’s just get it out there. Giuseppe and I are like smiling through it, but I wanted to throw-up. Mutual Friend, bless his little heart. He’s a real honest person. Before the term “Keep it 100” came out, there was Mutual Friend. This fool turns to the host and hostess and askes if they knew they gave us Play-do. Okay, imagine the record scratch noise. Yeah. The whole damn party stopped and looked over at us. Giuseppe had poi on his fingers and his eyes are darting back and forth from me to Mutual Friend, like trying to ask: “What do we do now?” I turn to the host and hostess, and tell them in my most sincere voice, Mutual Friend just had surgery and his medication is doing havoc with his sense of smell and taste. He’s a foreigner too and this is new, so he doesn’t know what poi is. Did that go over? Well, the natives didn’t throw spears at us. So we continue with the luau. Thank the host and hostess and go back to our room. I don’t think we’ll be invited back. LOL Giuseppe rips Mutual Friend a new one. I’m laughing my ass off. And even Giuseppe had to admit in the end that that shit was nasty. It’s real late, and we go to our separate rooms and call it night. I’m watching the Weather Channel, which is fascinating in Hawaii, I have to admit. The guys said they were going to watch some sports. They next day. We want to take a boat trip to Pearl Harbor. It’s not post 9/11, so we can still go by boat. This is significant. We didn’t know that that trip we took would be the last one due to military security. They could now, I don’t know, but we never entertained going back to Hawaii, and I’ll get to that. We take our boat trip, and me with my History Degree and a connoisseur in WWII history, having taught a few classes at UCLA, I was stoked! We see the Arizona submerged in the water; you know the oil is still there. Chilling, sad, just mind blowing. We spend the day at the museum. I love this stuff. The guys, they like it for what it is, they feel it, but not like yours truly. Again we’re back at the hotel. I’m in the guy’s room and tired as hell. I want to go to my room; they talk me into staying there. I have the bed, they take the couch and chair. The next day we go to the big island. We take a helicopter. My eyes are closed through the whole trip. The guys are like “look at that volcano!” I’m like I don’t want to crash in the damn volcano. We arrive, do some shopping, eating, sightseeing, you know typical tourist stuff. We fly back to Oahu. We’re in our own rooms. I go to sleep. Then….. I hear something moving. I turn on the lights. I’m looking around, I still hear something, but can’t see it… until I look over on my dresser. There is a spider the size of artichoke! I scream. The guys literally bust into my room, break the door. I’m in the corner pointing, they see it, they jump. Giuseppe throws something at it….. The damn thing jumps on the wall. Oh shit! I yell, tell Giuseppe he made it mad, now it’s going to get us. People are coming out of their rooms to see the commotion. We show them, pointing…. They laugh. “Oh that’s a such and such spider. It’s harmless.” You know what? We ain’t hearing it. We are looking at something that looks like it reversed the food chain. The people leave. I’m yelling at them to take the spider with them since it’s so damn harmless. Then management shows up. Mind you we’re still in the corner. Mutual Friend has a lighter. He makes the flame go real high and long, and he moves toward the spider still on the wall. He was going to set that thing on fire. Giuseppe is holding him, I’m holding Giuseppe. The manager screams “Don’t!” The spider leaps over towards me. I never ran so fast. I knock down the manager, run down the hall to the elevator, Giuseppe and Mutua Friend are close behind. We’re in our pajamas, okay. People are coming out, looking at us, they are amused. We’re not…and neither is the manager. We have to pay for that door. They guys are like “oh hell no!” and explain the situation. They thought I was in distress, blah, blah, blah. I hate spiders, so do they. The manager said here are more where that came from and since we hare on the third floor, the spiders find their way there. Guess what? New hotel. Guess what? The]y hell with that nothing above the 8th floor. We get a penthouse suite. Oh, yeah, we’re living large for the next two days. LOL By the way, the manager and the three us came to a compromise. He knocked of two days off our stay and we paid for the door. And those spiders are very popular and abundant. With a lot of other creatures. So guess what? We left Hawaii and never saw her since! But all in all we did unwind, and forgot our past troubles. We were refreshed….after we calmed down from that adrenaline rush. Did the guys try to come on to me? To their credit, no. But Giuseppe was secretly hatching a plan all the while. And that’s where I’ll leave it for now
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Well Giuseppe is on his way! Whether he was actually coming to see a client or get new ones, I don’t know. I think he knew something was up with Mutual Friend. Remember, they are real close, like blood brothers. I was in panic mode, but I’ve been through worse, so I knew how to handle this situation. Mutual Friend had to go. He didn’t have to go back to the States, but he had to get the hell out of here! I told him that Giuseppe was coming by, and it was soon. So Mutual Friend left and told me not to tell Giuseppe until he explains. Whatever. I wasn’t going to say anything anyway, because one that was between them and two, nothing happened between me and Mutual Friend, so there was nothing to explain. So he went to who knows where. And I waited for the inevitable! I think it was less than three days, because I remember it happening in the middle of the week, and it was before a weekend. Giuseppe calls me: G: I’m at the airport, come get me. Me: I’m busy, rent a car G: Bitch, if you don’t get your ass over here! Me: I got your Bitch in my back pocket. Giuseppe gets a rent a car and comes to my hotel. Yeah, I had it like that. LOL He comes to my room, scrunches up his nose and the first thing he says: “That rat bastard was here!” Me: Really? And who might that be? G: I smell his cheap cologne. Where is he now? I told him I have no idea, and I really didn’t. And I told him nothing happened between us, not even a kiss. I don’t know why to this day I had to tell him that. But I did. Giuseppe said he knew nothing happened between us, because he knew what type of woman I was. But he was still pissed. He said he trusts Mutual Friend with is life—but with women, he wasn’t too sure. I told him that was a personal problem between them and leave me out of it. And oh…. …You have to leave, you don’t have to go back to the States, but you have to get the hell out of here. He said if he wasn’t a gentleman, he would have stayed, but he left. I told him don’t contact me either. Now, I know you guys maybe like: “Oh, you ungrateful bitch! After they helped you through your nervous breakdown, blah, blah, blah.” In theory you would be right, HOWEVER, I didn’t need the stress and the pressure of the two after me. They were giving me another breakdown! Again, they were my FRIENDS, that was it. Nothing more. Then something happened. As some of you know Giuseppe’s family has some connections. His father, Papa Spalino ran around with Luck Luciano back in the day. However, one of Giuseppe’s uncles fought the mafia. I used the past tense, because he was bumped off. Found his torso in a river in Palermo. No arms, legs or head. Guess who did it? A gang that Giuseppe’s cousin ran with. His cousin vowed vengeance on the people. Wrong move. He killed the man that got Giuseppe’s uncle. Now he was on the run. All three of us met up, forgot how it happened, I think Giuseppe called Mutual friend and we met at a café. Any animosity was forgotten. Anyway. We left for Sicily. We where worried about Giuseppe’s family particularly his mother and father. When we arrived in Sicily, we met up with one of Giuseppe’s brother on the road before we got to the house. He handed Giuseppe a huge gun. Look like a 12-gauge. He handed Mutual friend a .45. Me? He told me to go back home, this was no place for a woman. Giuseppe and Mutual friend told them about me and Vinnie. He was impressed, but still wanted me out of the way. The guys agreed. I didn’t. So after much arguing, we arrived at Giuseppe’s old home. His mom and dad and seven other siblings were already there. I’m asking Giuseppe and Mutual Friend why the guns? They said is someone that didn’t have the last name of Spalino walked through the door, they could cancel Christmas. Now, I understand the problem here. But I didn’t want my friends to be involved in murder, and that’s what it would have been. So I’m having another breakdown. Mutual Friend is trying to calm me while Giuseppe is tending to family business and talking with siblings and trying to get information. Well, about two weeks later, the person that was supposed to get his cousin for killing the man that killed the uncle, was found whacked with two of his lieutenants. So the contract was called off, because they ended up getting some others and they sang like canaries. Yeah, that was stressful. So after the three of us got our nerves back in order, it was decided we take a vacation. They didn’t have any clients. I just finished exporting some goods, so I had nothing else to do. We go Hawaii. This was a funny as hell trip. OMG. Never going back there again, and the guys said if they never go back it will be too soon. And we’ll get to that next time |
AuthorI'm living a lifestyle that some might romanticize, while others condemn. But more importantly, I'm happy, And the guys that I'm with are happy too. Nuff Said! Archives
March 2022
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