Okay gang, let’s continue….
So, the now Hubster was okay with Mutual Friend being all touch feely with me. I wasn’t that accepting. I understand that he was still our best friend. I knew how he felt about me as a friend. I knew how he felt about Giuseppe. But when it crossed the platonic line, then all bets were off. Apparently not for Mutual Friend…or Giuseppe. So I decided to do something about it on my end. I would avoid being alone with Mutual Friend. This wasn’t too hard now since I was married. I’m spending more time with my husband. I’m still in the honeymoon phase. So I made sure that either the Hubster or another friend was with me when I was with Mutual friend. I figure he wouldn’t notice anyway, since we always had other friends hanging with us from time to time. My plan was working pretty well for about four months, until Giuseppe had to go out of town on business. I and Mutual Friend had to stay and watch the store so to speak. So now, I really had to rely on friends and family to be around. At work was easy, there were the other employees. But at night, when I was at home, that’s when it got tricky. Mutual Friend made it a point to make sure I was safe. After all, I was alone in a big house, and people can tell when someone is out of town. He would see me home, stay for a while and leave late at night, so the neighbors wouldn’t see him leaving, thinking there was still someone with me. That was cool. It what was happening in the house that the neighbors couldn’t see that was disturbing. On the surface, things seemed cool. He would cook dinner; he loves to cook. We watched television and talked about the workday and what we had to do the next morning. Then when it was time for him to leave, things got a little too cozy. He wouldn’t leave until I took my shower and got dressed for bed. Then he would kiss me goodnight. Not a kiss on the cheek or forehead either. Each time I told him that I was capable of seeing myself to bed and a goodnight kiss wasn’t necessary. That didn’t deter him. The Hubster was out of town for two looooonnng weeks. I talked to him every night. And I told him how Mutual Friend was behaving. Again, the Hubster chuckled it off. He kept telling me that Mutual Friend loved me as if I were his too. Humor him. Let him kiss me, kiss him back. That’s all he wanted. Let him know that you still loved him….as a friend and that nothing changed between the three of us. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Even though this was a good friend of ours, and a very good close friend to the Hubster, almost a blood brother, this was not acceptable. At least not to me. So one night, Mutual Friend went through the same routine. When it came time for me to go to bed, he kissed me on the lips. But this time it seemed different. Instead of taking me by the shoulders and kissing me, he sat on the edge of the bed and made me sit next to him. He wanted to have a talk. He told me no matter how I try to push him away, his feelings for me were not going to change. He could stop kissing me, but that wouldn’t change the feelings. They would still be there. He was not apologizing for how he felt, and since Giuseppe already knew how he felt it wasn’t like he was hiding anything. So why not let him kiss me good night, get it over with and that would be that. Long story short, I fell for it. I let him kiss me…why!?! Before I knew it, I was on my back, and he was not letting up. (Side note: Mutual Friend is an aggressive lover, yet he’s a Beta, where as The Hubster is gentle and he’s an Alpha. Go figure) Strange thing was, I liked it. I also liked it when Mutual Friend would hug me and hold me. We never really dated, but we did hang together for a bit, but even he said he wasn’t the right man for me on a permanent basis, at least that’s what he said then. Now, things seemed to have changed. I allowed Mutual Friend his affections. He seemed happier and it never went beyond the kisses goodnight. It went on for the last four days. After the fourth day, I actually missed them, but then The Hubster was back in town. He thanked Mutual Friend for watching me, keeping me safe. It was business as usual. Sort of. I had to talk to Giuseppe. I told him what happened those last four days. I was shocked by his response. He smirked and said. “At least I know my friend can take care of things while I’m out.” I told him, that’s not how marriage works. He said, who’s talking marriage? I’m talking about a good friend who we both love taking care of the woman I love. By the way, he enjoyed the time alone together[SW1] , especially when you enjoyed his affection. I had to remind him that I married him. “Technically yes,” he said. But you also married Mutual Friend. He then sat me down and told me this: I wanted to marry you from the first day I saw you. You weren’t having it, but I grew on you. You meet Mutual Friend and he fell for you. Okay, he’s the friend and family I choose, who is closer to me than my actual brothers. Did I see this coming? No. Have we ever been in love with the same woman? No. But I’m not surprised that it happened. The person that is having the problem is you. I’m not mad at you, I understand. You see marriage as between two people. Sometimes you marry into a whole family and their friends. Sometimes that’s good, sometimes that’s bad. Mutual Friend is that friend that you are also married too. His feelings are not going to change, and I don’t expect them to, that’s why I never say anything to him. But you could make things a bit easier by letting him show affection towards you. It’s not like he’s taking you to bed. I was numb at this point. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I countered back thou, hoping to knock some sense into him. I asked him, “Is it because you know who the other man is (not a stranger) that he doesn’t feel threatened and it’s okay? His next answer shocked me. He said, no. If it were another man that was coming on to you, I would kill him, and my feelings towards you would change considerably. But I know you, look at you getting crazy about a man that loves you and you love too. This is totally different. By the way, did I mention that you …love ….him…too? Or did you forget that part? Okay, so now he was being smart, so that question didn’t shake him, so I asked another that I just knew would get him crazy. “Suppose Mutual Friend and I slept together while you were out of town?” Again his answer shook me. “I would hope that you told me first.” “Then you stop us?” “No, I would rather know, and let you know that it was okay.” “Why did we get married? We could have all stayed friends and slept together, if that’s what you wanted.” I yelled. At his time I was mad, confused, and frustrated with his cavalier attitude. Then he said: “We got married because I wanted something more than friendship. You said it right there, why not we all remained just friends. I don’t want to be just friends with you. And since you married me, I would like to think the feeling was mutual. But you’re not getting it. Mutual Friend is a part of this too. Maybe not like a real husband, but he’s just as committed, and loves you just as much. When you finally get that through your head, you won’t be so torn as they say about the situation. Now, I’m going to go talk with Mutual Friend, you get a list of things that need to be tended to at work. He walked out of the room, and I stood there horrified. I ran to him and asked him what he needed to talk to Mutual Friend about that he can’t say in front of me, since we’re all such great pals. He told me “there are some things that I don’t need to be privy too (I’m surprised he knew the word). Just like there are things that you and I talk about that he doesn’t need to know. But let me ask you something.” “What?” “When he was kissing you and hugging you. Did you enjoy it? Be honest.” The fact was…. I did. I like how Mutual Friend feels. I like how he kisses me and says things in my ear in Italian. I like the roughness he shows sometimes. But I shouldn’t like any of it and I told Giuseppe so. He said that’s too bad. Things would go a lot a smoother if I didn’t have the guilt. SIGH. At this point, I didn’t know were our marriage was going…if it was a marriage. I kept playing over and over in my head the things he said, trying to make sense of it all. I was brought up that you only married one person. It seemed that I married two, and I was the only one having an issue with it. The next year of our marriage would big the big test. And that’s coming up in the next post
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Hello Peeps!
Let me pick up were Mutual Friend left off. We were resting in New York, at a hotel. The Hubster and I were tired from our fun wacky around the world trip. Yeah, we did the most, and some of it could have gotten us arrested. But we didn’t care. It was exciting and dangerous. Mutual Friend was tired too, but a different kind of tired. The hubster was in our room sleeping. I was with Mutual Friend in his room talking about the trip and talking about the future of the business. Things were slowing down, and we had to find new clients. He was drifting off to sleep, probably bored of the conversation. But then he said something that made me feel some kind of way. He asked me if I would join him. At first, I didn’t think I heard him right. Then he asked again, just to lay next to him while he drifted off. I was speechless. Then I shrugged it off thinking he was only tired and just talking. I told him playfully that I would have to ask my husband, but I think he might have an issue with it. Then he said something that I couldn’t ignore. He told me Giuseppe wouldn’t mind at all. I told him I would take issue with that, but never mind. You’re tired. I kept telling Mutual Friend that he was tired and needed to rest. And to stop the crazy talk. After I tucked him some more, he fell asleep. I left the room and returned back to mine. Giuseppe was still sawing wood. I didn’t get any sleep that night. The next morning, I remembered the guys wanted a huge breakfast and was deciding whether to go out or have room service. They compromised, and had food delivered from a local diner. It was quite at the table as we ate. I wondered if Mutual Friend even remembered asking me to sleep with him last night. But the whole question was bugging the hell out of me. When Mutual Friend left to go downstairs to get some magazines from the gift shop, I told Giuseppe everything. At first, he was quiet, which at times is not a good thing. Then he looked at me and smiled and asked, “Why are you so surprised?” I was taken back to say the least. I told him that was fine….sort of, when I was single and we were just dating, but now we’re married. I’m off limits!” He shook his head, and say not really, not in his mind. Nothing has changed, especially his feelings and I am not going to get mad at him or confront him for his feelings. My question is to you, would you even consider? I told him of course not. He asked why. I reminded him of the sanctity of marriage. He just brushed that off, saying “that’s fine if there were only two people involved, but when you married me you also married Mutual Friend. Maybe he did overstep him himself as you say. I’ll talk with him.” Well thanks, I appreciate it. (dripping sarcasm). As soon as Mutual Friend walked back into the room. Giuseppe’s like, “I need to talk to you, man.” He told him everything I said right there while I was still in the room. He didn’t even wait to take him aside. REALLY? Then Mutual friend said something that made sense in a twisted sort of way. He said he took those vows seriously too, but as a friend to both of us. Maybe he did get carried away. Was he apologizing? No. He felt what he felt. And that was okay with Giuseppe. I was still a bit miffed. We finally came back home. We went back to work quickly. They had two commercials to do, both overseas clients, but we didn’t have to go overseas to complete. Thank goodness, because we weren’t feeling it. Weeks went by without anything major. Giuseppe and I were making a home at his house. There were a lot of things I had to do for my condo. Mutual friend said he would take care of that for me. He helped me get out of my lease. He had all my furniture moved either into Giuseppe’s house or, the stuff I didn’t want, put into storage. I was more than grateful. So Giuseppe and I were enjoying being a new married couple. I felt kinda strange thou, since I never wanted to get married in the first place. Not what you think. If I had to marry someone it would be Giuseppe. I just never wanted to be a “wife” to any man. I always felt you loose part of yourself. You’re just a Mrs. now and not you. You’re tied to him. And you have to answer to someone. I was always a free spirit. It hurts my soul when I have to answer to anyone, when I’m not my own person. However, Giuseppe never made me feel like a Stepford Wife. It was as though we were still just best friends. And I appreciated that. Mutual Friend on the other hand was moping a bit. He would put on a brave face when we called him on it. He swore up and down nothing was wrong. I told Giuseppe he needed to talk to his best friend again. So one day the two of them went out to dinner. I stayed home. This was between the two of them. I didn’t need to be there. Giuseppe knew his friend better than I did. They grew up together. They had that between them, something I didn’t, no matter how long I knew him. Giuseppe came home late that evening, so we talked about the evening the next morning at breakfast. What Giuseppe told be was a bit shocking, but not surprising. Mutual friend was not going to stop having feelings for me. So, I might as well get use to that. He will however, not come one to me, make suggestions, or anything out of place….. ….not without Giuseppe’s permission. I’m like, “what the hell is that suppose to mean?” He said it’s supposed to mean, if Mutual Friend wanted to be flirty with me, he had to get permission from him. Well how about your little bride? He said humor him. If it will make him happy for the day, that I kiss him on the cheek or let him hug me every now and then, then allow it. Besides, I know Italians. They are very touchy feely anyway. They love to kiss and hug everybody. This is really no different if I stop and think about it. I was going to let hat go…for the time being. Now what was concerning me was why Giuseppe was so tolerant of anther man being touchy feely with his wife, even if it was his best friend. That’s in the next part…… |
AuthorI'm living a lifestyle that some might romanticize, while others condemn. But more importantly, I'm happy, And the guys that I'm with are happy too. Nuff Said! Archives
March 2022
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